Learning how to be assertive is a core communication skill. It means that you are able to express yourself effectively and stand up for your point of view, while also respecting the rights and beliefs of others. Assertiveness can help control stress and anger and it will also help to improve coping skills. Of course, in life it is not always what you say but in how you say it that is most important. Assertive communication is direct and respectful.
There are three types that we know about: Aggressive, Passive and Assertive. Passive equals to being shy and/or overly easy-going. When you are passive, you are giving others the license to disregard your wants and needs. Aggressive is the act of appearing self-righteous or superior. It is an arrogance which may come off to many others as a form of bullying; one who is inconsiderate to others’ ideas and feelings.
Assertiveness is based on mutual respect and it’s an effective, diplomatic communication style. Choosing to be assertive will give you the best chance of delivering your message successfully. I have noticed many times that a conversation/dialogue runs smoothly when both individuals are direct and have respect for each other. When you choose to be passive or aggressive, the message is lost because most times, a person will react to the delivery of the message. This is how misunderstanding and misinterpretation form.
Being assertive makes sense! It also helps with stress management especially if you are the type of person who can never say “No”. Remember, learning to be assertive takes time and practice. If you have spent years silencing yourself(passive) or on the flip side if you have serious anger issues (aggressive), choosing to find a balance won’t happen overnight. But with constant training, on your own or with professional help, you will find that you will be pleased with the outcome.